Nana's Suprise Birthday Party

From: jh@email.com
To: thegirls@email.com
Subject: Nana

Sorry I haven't responded before now about the party ... thanks for remembering though! It was a huge success. A major joint effort: C manned the kitchen per usual, his mom made a Happy Birthday banner for me, R came to help me set up, and my dad policed the premises (not kidding) in order to ... keep us safe from church robbers?

A couple of funny moments:

So I had to find a way to convince Nana that she should get her hair did before Saturday afternoon without raising suspicion. Her hair lady was on vacay and Nana had decided she could "let it go" another week. Problem? She looked like a crackhead, her delicate snow white curls fraying in every possible direction. My solution was to lie to her and say, "Surprise! We are getting a family portrait made Saturday afternoon." She totally bought it.

My aunt washed, dried, and "set" (I don't understand the processes involved in old lady hair) Nana's twig, put her in a fancy skirt suit, and off they went to meet me and Dad out "for lunch." Approximatley 70 people had assembled at Nana's home away from home, the church. Even with balloons tied to the front entrance, she still didn't get it. When we walked in, everyone began singing Happy Birthday and she started to cry :(. When we were cutting the cake, she said she'd like to say something to the guests, and after rambling for a few minutes, she ended with the sweetest line I've ever heard Nana say, "All of my favorite people are here. I need to make this last forever." How cute is that?

Now considering it was just a birthday party filled with purchased-en-masse Sam's Club hors d'ouerves and ginger ale punch, I can think of a few things I'd rather make last forever. But Nana loved it, and the St. Paul's rednecks loved it perhaps even more!

The only other totally hilarious thing to share regarding the party is: Apparently a few of the church members are "upset" they were left off the invitation list. Keep in mind these are totally ancillary people in Nana's life who probably couldn't name the last time they've called or stopped in to see Nana. Several women did their best to plant this seed about being upset to Elsie, knowing she would gossip about it and it would get back to me. Isn't that sneaky? When I heard the name of one of the upset women, I made sure to let Elsie know I intentionally left that woman off the list because, surprise again!, she is a nosy bitch cloaked in Southern propriety. Hopefully that makes its way back to her as quickly as it got to me.


From: mh@email.com
To: thegirls@email.com
Subject: Re: Nana

I LOVE THIS EMAIL.

Saving and marking as "important."